Friday, October 31, 2008

Happy Halloween!

Saturday, October 11, 2008


As usual, I'm late. Yesterday was my one year blogiversary. In the past year so much as happened. Some good things, some bad things. I may have taken backward steps but I've continued to try move forward. My friends that come here have been a huge inspiration. I still marvel that people find my posts interesting enough to read, to comment on and to come back! Thank you, all so very, very much.

In honor of my blogiversary and because it's breast cancer awareness month, I'm doing a raffle. Leave a comment and IF YOU CAN (not required) make at least a $1.00 donation to my daughter's Susan G. Komen Race for The Cure team and you'll be entered! Pass the word, I don't care if people never come back to read me as long as they make the donation and leave a comment. In case you don't know why this is important to me go HERE.

Here's what you'll get:

*A Mini-Wantchi Waterproof Vibrator with batteries
*Sample of Just Like Me Lubricant - Wet Watermelon
*A pair of Softy (silicone) Cock Rings
*Watermelon-Kiwi Shower Gel and Body Lotion
*Lacy, crotchless panties
*Pink "Awareness" Duckie to remind you to self-exam
*A pair of edible strawberry pasties

All wrapped up in a gift bag to be given to a special someone or just to make YOU feel special.

I'll do a random drawing next Saturday from all people who've left a comment.

I do hope that y'all will continue to come to read about my weird, wonderful, horrible, crazy life. This "bunny" loves each and every one of you.

Friday, October 3, 2008

And now for something completely different ...

Recently I did a post about shaving my friend Art. Although it wasn’t really sensual or erotic, it did show me how trusting people can be when you care about each other. I now will tell you about how much Mulder cares for me and trusts me. It’s not pretty.

Since I decided to kick office work to the curb and become an esthetician, not only do I do facials, waxing and make-up in school but I have to practice at home. When you ask friends and relatives if they’d like to be your guinea pig test model, they all want a facial (hold the extractions) and be made up. Getting waxed on any body part – not so much. My daughter has allowed me to do her legs. My son let me rip hair off his back. I really, really enjoyed that. Sort of payback for his birth. My son-in-law has let me wax and tweeze his unibrow. He does look much better with two eyebrows. I can’t wait to do the guys nose hair.
So, I’ve had some waxing practice. But no bikini or Brazilian recruits.

A few weeks ago, the class was shown a video on doing male Brazilian waxing. It didn’t look too hard. The main thing was to pull the skin taunt and have the victim subject assist in the process by holding dangly bits out of the way. Mulder, bless his heart, volunteered to be my first male Brazilian client.

To wax smaller, more sensitive areas such as the pubic zone, you use “hard” wax. It’s a wax that doesn’t need have pressure applied onto a fabric strip for removing the hair. It adheres only to the hair, not the skin, and is pulled off in its entirety just as you’ve placed the wax on the area to be de-haired. This wax will be less traumatic for the skin that is growing the pubes. Definitely a plus when you’re ripping hair out of a guy’s balls and butt crack. Being a newbie to the whole esthetician arena, I didn’t know the subtleties of the actual wax to be used. “Hard” wax, I knew was the product to use but didn’t know that there were so many qualities of hard wax. So I heated up the hard wax that I purchased at the suggestion of the Sally Beauty Supply salesperson. (I can hear y’all now going, “Uh!OH!)

Mulder had showered and exfoliated the night before. He happily stretched out nude on the bed while I arranged the supplies, tested the wax and did a little hair trimming. When all was ready, I started to apply the wax to his groin. I figured the entire process would take about 45 minutes (it took the video woman about 20). My first clue that this wasn’t going to be easy was when the wax took a very long time to “set up.” Meaning it got hard enough to be stripped off. Once it finally was ready I flicked the edge. Flicking the edge is done to get a grip in order to tear it and the hair off. Remember, this type of wax is not supposed to stick to the skin. This wax wasn’t coming up with the normal flick. It appeared to be stuck to hair AND skin. I needed to PRY the end up to begin the ripping. Once that was done, much to Mulder’s shock of my fingers digging into the area, I began to use my smooth wrist motion to remove the strip quickly, parallel to the skin. This is supposed to be an instantaneous action. 1-2-3 wax off! Except when the wax breaks. And break my wax did. Over and over and over again.

Mulder remained stoic throughout the entire 2.5 hour process. He never screamed or punched me. Now, we did take several breaks to smoke and drink beer. Seriously, I should have given Mulder beer intravenously, the poor guy. I asked a few times if he wanted me to stop but he bit the bullet and told me to continue. I tried a thicker application of wax. I tried smaller areas, bigger areas, cooler wax, hotter wax – this was when Mulder’s testicles high-tailed it into his body and I was worried we’d never see them again – no matter what I did, the wax refused to cooperate. Instead of watching and feeling a lovely ballet supplied by the cremaster reflex, I prayed to The Waxing Gods that I wouldn’t accidently rip his balls off with the wax and have a cremaster muscle fly out of the carnage. I do have to say that after about 4-5 beers, we began to laugh. Laugh like lunatics. I’m pale, shaky and sweating from stress and Mulder is naked with his crotch looking like a failed science experiment. But we were able to laugh.

It felt good to be with someone that loves and trusts me enough to let me apply hot wax to his most delicate, precious area and then rip it off, all so I can become a really good esthetician. He actually is going to let me do it again. AFTER I’ve gone to the esthetician convention this weekend and have purchased some much better quality wax. He’s a very brave man. Well … very brave or very stupid. Probably a little of both considering he still wanted to be with me even after the divorce. As you’ve might have guessed, I’m not really an easy person to live (be) with.

There was absolutely nothing sexy, erotic or sensual about doing a male Brazilian wax on Mulder but it was a bonding experience. Bonding is something we need. To be totally honest, I don’t remember if we had sex afterwards or if I even had the strength to give him a world class blow-job. I truly think that if his cock had seen me coming anywhere near it, it would have gone into hiding, trembling with fear. If it could, it probably would have screamed like a banshee

P.S.(Check out my entry in the SKULLADAY contest! It's the last one.)