Tuesday, December 29, 2009

TMI Tuesday

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Monday, December 21, 2009

Rambling and stuff ...

From A Dust Bunny In The Wind

My son and his friend call Tim Tebow, the quarterback for the Florida Gators – Little Baby Jesus.
For some odd reason, I find that one of the funniest things I’ve ever heard.

Women, please tell me why the fuck you send your clueless husband and sugar-high children to the grocery store? He has no idea what you want so he’s on the cell phone with you while the little bastards children wreak havoc in the aisles. Is this saving you any time? No, you just want to punish us people without Satan’s spawn kids, don’t you? Bitches! While I’m on that topic, old women, why do you bring your old fart husbands with you? I realize you’re on a “fixed income” (Who the hell isn’t?) but will the .25 difference in price between store brand and name brand Shredded Wheat that you are discussing like it was a cure for cancer in the middle of the damn aisle with your cart, push you over the edge into destitution? Will it?

Does the fact that Tiger Woods can’t keep his dick from sinking putts in every female hole he encounters really affect his golfing ability? Does anyone really care?

One of my absolute favorite things to do is give an amazing blow-job. I do them very, very well.

A woman I work with laughs CONSTANTLY. Even while she is talking. Nothing is that fucking funny and she gets on my last nerve.

Sometimes doing something nice, just because, gets you a little kiss from Karma. I made those Rolo Pretzels and brought some to the women in the shop that does my facials. They were a big hit and I got a free pedicure. Sweet!

Art said something that makes a whole lot of sense. He’s not religious, he’s spiritual.  Art also gave me some fabulous chocolate from a local candy maker for Christmas.  Can you guess what I gave him? 

I have finally succumbed to the "Twilight" mania. I bought "Twilight" and "New Moon" books. (Just to keep things in perspective, I also finally got Rachel Green's "An Ungodly Child" which I've wanted forever!) Now, I adore a good vampire story but I was resistant about this whole "Twilight" thing because of the hype and because of teenagers. I haven't seen the movies and may not because that Robert Pattinson guy just isn't my idea of sexy.  Brad Pitt, now HE'S a sexy vampire.

Is anybody else just skeeved out by those PSA commercials with some random male TV stars telling you to get your wife, girlfriend, etc. a PAP smear for Christmas or Hanukkah? Seriously, WTF?

Guess what? Tonic water with lime and gin makes me want to dance! At my office Christmas party, I danced like no one was watching. Just between us, I looked FABULOUS! (I love me some Spanx!) The DJ wanted to dance with me and when I said I was hot, as in hot from dancing, one of my co-workers (young) husband said, "Yes, you are!" He meant I was, "HOT!" It made me feel so good, I had another gin and tonic.

I'll be back on Thursday for the Three Wishes HNT.  Right now I only have one thought out. Guess I'd better get my ass in gear for the other two!

Oh! FETLIFE is have one helluva giveaway.  Go visit.  NOW!

THESE are hysterical!

Friday, December 11, 2009

ASM Treat Exchange

Another Suburban Mom is doing a blogger holiday recipe exchange so me being so well versed in the kitchen, I figured I’d join in.

This is a fun, easy candy recipe that only uses three things – none of which you actually have to measure!  You can make as many or as few as you want but I suggest making plenty because people seem to love ‘em.

Rollo Pretzel Turtles

1 bag of Rollo candies  (These are chocolate covered caramel candies)  The bag has about 50 or so pieces.

1 bag of tiny pretzel twists or Snyder “Snaps” (These are small square pretzels)

Pecan or Walnut halves – one for as many “turtles” you are making

Place the pretzels on a baking sheet and top each one with a Rollo candy.  Bake in a 250 degree oven for 1-2 minutes or until the candy just starts to melt.  Take them out, squash a nut half on top of each.  Let the cool and harden and you’re ready for some sweet/salty goodness!


Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Blogger Holiday Spirit

The sexy, wonderful Amorous Rocker is doing a fund raiser over at her place. Hit her up, it's for a good cause and it'll make you feel all warm and fuzzy!


Friday, December 4, 2009

So cute, you'll gag!