Sunday, March 9, 2008

Career change?




Last week I was having coffee with a new friend. We were talking about gas prices, butt plugs, why Starbucks uses such stupid names for small, medium and large, sex parties – you know, the usual “girl talk.” I mentioned that I was curious as to why so many men wanted to be dominated. The discussion then turned to the possibility of me becoming a professional Dominatrix.

As I may have mentioned before, I hate (really HATE) going to work every freakin’ day. I’m bored, I’m pissy, people in general annoy me, so basically I don’t really play well with others. I enjoy running with scissors but that’s another story. I took a little peek into my id and thought I just might make a right fine Domme.

After I got home, I zipped over to Amazon.com to see if they had “Dominance for Dummies.” Of the 3,686 “for Dummies” books, there wasn’t one for how to become a Dominatrix. Imagine! I pressed on and ordered three promising looking tomes: The Art of Sensual Female Dominance, Mistress Manual and The Sexually Dominant Woman. They haven’t arrived yet but my lovely suede flogger has. Here, have a look at it. I also have purchased, prior to the Domme thoughts, a soft, luscious leather corset. It laces up the back. Extremely sexy and very Goth. In addition to the corset, I’ve gotten a short leather skirt, leather bra and leather dress. Now don’t get all PETA on me. The sheep were already dead; I didn’t order them custom or anything. I could never, ever hurt an animal. Animals don’t have the power of free will or cognitive thought. Cats come very close, though. The question is – could I hurt and/or humiliate a human being? Specifically a man?


Fantasy is one thing and I can enjoy the hell out of hurting and humiliating several men in my mind. Flogging them until they cry. Maliciously running a Wartenburg wheel over their balls. Making them crawl to sit at my feet like a dog. Yeah, in my mind, I can get off on it. Big time. But … what about real life? I do have major pent up anger. Like I said before, I’m usually pissed-off about something all the time. So I guess that taking out some of that aggression on a willing participant could be a great tension reliever. Yeah. I believe I could be a good Domme. Start-up costs could be very high. I’ve checked out some BDSM sites. I might be able to use left-over Vise-Grips from DAC’s shop as nipple clamps and possibly an oil can spout as an evil butt plug to save money until I start getting paid. I’m wondering how much I should charge. Should I write of a menu of services do you think?

My friend, even though a new friend, seemed to think I could be a fabulous Dominatrix. I wonder what she saw in me that made her think that. I was being very nice that day. However I guess wickedness just seeps out. If after reading and doing additional research if I decide to press forward with the whole Domme thing, I’ll let y’all know. It might be fun to be able to write the 3,687 “Dummies” book. So, if you see my “Psycho Bunny” avatar holding a flogger instead of a knife and wearing wee fishnets, you’ll know I’ve made up my mind.

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On a different note, I'd like to thank Casdok (Mother of Shrek) for this blogging award:




I was also given an award by DJ Kirkby:



I'm very proud of and touched to be given awards by such amazing bloggers. Thank you, both.

By reading Casdok and DJ's blogs, I've learned about Autism. I of course, had a passing knowledge of the disability but did not know the laughter and tears that come with having an Autistic child. These awesome women bring both those things to the forefront with sensitivity and humor. I admire them both very much. I hate using the word "disability" when writing about their children because Casdok and DJ never portray their kids as disabled. They both enable N3S and C to have the best they can possibly give. In return, I think they are given gifts most of us will never receive.

For DJ and Casdok, their kids and families and for all who might have or know an Autistic child, I urge you to visit this site: WHAT KIND OF WORLD DO YOU WANT?

The band FIVE FOR FIGHTING has set up the site to donate money to 5 different charities. One is AUTISM SPEAKS . So, go to the What Kind of World Do You Want? site, hear some great music and very painlessly donate to Autism Speaks and the other four charities. It's a good thing. No, it's a GREAT thing.

20 blew out from under the bed:

Eve in Chains said...

You go! I think even the sweetest of people in their daily lives can be "evil" in their sensual lives. Anyway, it was strength that I saw in you, not an ability to be diabolical. ;)

hugs,

Eve

Sorrow said...

Somehow I think a bunny with a whip is scarier than a bunny with a bloody knife...
Good luck on that career move, Think of the muscle tone you are going to be getting!

Ron said...

OMG, Nitebyrd!!!

This post is brilliantly hysterical!!

I'm telling you...you need to be thinking about writing stories for Playgirl...you're fabulous!

Thats your new career!! You can sit at home, away from all the irritating people of the world (which I totally agree with you) and write stories from your computer!!!

PLUS...be a Dominatrix!

You'll be rolling in dough$

Hey congrats on your awards, my dear friend. They are SOOO deserved!!

Now get crackin' with that WHIP...tsssht!

Mortuis said...

Hmmmm... need a practice dummy?

Casdok said...

Apprenlty you could earn a lot of money! Not that i would know of course!
Thanks for the autism plug (even though i am not a fan of Autism Speaks!)

Utter Basketcase said...

Grrrr! Hey for some reason I have trouble with commenting on your posts! It can take hours for it to work for me, so forgive me if I'm late or what not!

OMG Nyte thats sooooooooooo coool! I reckon you'd make an awesome Dom you should sooo go for it! I have often thought about it myself, coz I hav heaps of anger from what some males have done to me in my life!

Getting paid to bully men around, can't get better than that! :-)

Your posts about the new job change would be soooo fun to read (even though they are already!)

Congrats on the awards too xx!

John-Michael said...

Why do I have a visual of you showing up at the next session of your Anger Management Group attired in your flashy (pun may or may not be intended) Domme Garb? The responses from the rest of the Group to your arrival (as well as your brandishing of that spiffy flogger) would be a total hoot! (I know! My mind is a scary place sometimes.)

Jackie Adshead said...

Sounds like a good idea to me. Let me know if you wanna pose for me in your new outfit!!

Spiky Zora Jones said...

I thought it would be hard to hurt another...but it isn't really once you get into that roll-play. I think it has to do with my acting and performing...I just need a director...a motivation. Money works! Ha.

I think you would make a fab dominatrix...remember the outfit has to be hot and if they don't agree that it's hot...whip them again and again...the little whining bastards. :D

Jeezh...I'm getting warm. hehehe

Congrats on the awards...so cool.

Ciao babes.

Vi said...

ooooo, we need photos in your outfit! lol!!

Unknown said...

Well, since Magnus beat me to it...(he asked exactly what my thought was) I guess I will have to just ask where the sign up sheet is. Practice Dummy In Training, that would look good on a resume...

PB

Dazzed and Confused said...

Great job on your awards I know they're from the heart.

As for the Dom thing, I think I'll just set on my side of the bed to critique and take notes.

FiachraLili said...

Wow :) love your blog, well done with your awards :)

Hugs lili :)

DJ Kirkby said...

Hi
I don't even know you in RL but think you would make a great Domme. Go for it! Thanks for the autism links, I will go have a look later, did you know I have Asperger's too?

Rupert said...

VICE GRIPS???

Holy crap, my balls just clawed their way up inside my body at the thought!

nitebyrd said...

Eve ~ Thank you. I am strong, sometimes I wish I weren't because a few months rest in a sanitarium sounds good every so often. It was great to meet you. My books came yesterday, I have lots of reading to do!

sorrow11 ~ Ooooo! I never thought of that! Toned arms, legs and abs. Sweet!

Ron ~ Thanks! My daydreams of pounding hapless co-workers into the ground may come in handy if I decide to pursue the Domme career. I can swing a wooden spoon like Babe Ruth (ask my kids) but I'm not sure that will translate to the finesse of cracking a whip.

Magnus and PB ~ I'll call you! ;)

Casdok ~ Thank you again. Since I'm getting on in years, making buckets of money quickly is appealing. Tell me about a better Autism charity and I'll pimp it. I want to do the right (best) thing.

VBF ~ Yeah, I'm warming up to that punishment/humiliation stuff for men. Gods! I'm sick and twisted, aren't I?

john-michael ~ I don't have an anger management group, that would be too normal. LOL

jackie ~ I would be flattered beyond words to model for you!

spiky ~ I could act, just not in front of a huge crowd. One on one or two would be okay. If I do say so myself, I look pretty damn hot in my corset.

Vi ~ I'll post one after I get back from New Orleans. I'm going to buy a fancy mask.

DAC ~ Thank you, hun. C'mon, you'll let me flog you just a little, right? Pretty please!

lili ~ Thank you very much. It's so nice of you to stop by. Love your blog!

DJ ~ I'm reading about Asperger's. You're welcome. Thanks for the vote of confidence! LOL

Rupert ~ Well, I'd only use them if you were a very bad boy!

Constance said...

Nitebyrd,
I think you have to BE mean to be a good domanatrix, and you've always struck me as nice.

Having anger and not playing well with others or revenge fantasies are just normal... (hmm, maybe that makes me a fledgling domanatrix too :)

The books should be interesting, the flogger sounds great... Might be good money, too.

Uh-oh, I'm taking this career change of yours WAAAAAY too seriously :)

Fat Controller said...

Fuuuuuck! Just your description makes me think you'd make a great dominatrix. You can practice on me any time baby!

Hint: I don't know if you can get anything similar locally but we have some cheap plastic clamps for gripping the edges of tarpaulin sheets, which have serrated jaws and are tightened by a screw. They make fantastic economy nipple clamps...or so I'm told. lol.

And you're right, sometimes only leather will do.

Indi said...

I've been under the spell of a Dominitrix and loved it, she weren't bad either! Women in tight black leather hi heel black leather boots and a wicked smile makes me melt in anticipation of what's to come.. you'd be gr8 at it, your highness still Lol...

Casdok said...

Auitsm Speaks want to cure autistic people ie wipe them all out. As your in the US, i dont really know of any charities over there.
But yes please pimp all you like! Your very good at it! :)