Wednesday, March 11, 2009

Randomness, Chin Hair and a Contest

The U.S. has “sprung ahead”. I loathe this time change. Yes, I know – we get more hours of daylight, yadda, yadda. I don’t care. The whole thing screws up my body clock or whatever the hell you call it. It gives me brain fog. I have phantom PMS to the max!

I cry every time I hear Sarah McLachlan sing that song in the animal commercial. I read Real Live Lesbian’s blog the other day about The Best Ice Cream in the World – cried. I went over to Loving Annie’s Travel Treasures. She had a post about Your Cell Phone Is Ringing – cried. Luckily, Annie had a recipe for cherry pie in a different post that kept me from drowning in tears and snot.

Even before the time change, I’ve been feeling zombie-ish and icky. *sigh* This also means I haven’t felt very sexy or horny. I’ve been clearing out Slumber Parties stuff because I have a “store” on Twisted Pleasures. Even holding and turning on vibrator after vibrator didn’t get me going. It’s a pitiful situation. I’m seeing Art on Friday so I hope that I’ll be feeling more “in the mood” by then. For Art’s sake, I’ll be making a heroic effort. I’ve got a DVD to review for Babeland, maybe I’ll bring that for inspiration.

Okay. I’ve whined enough. Now I’m going to bitch. As most of you know, I recently graduated from esthetician school. I’d LOVE to be able to get a job in this field but as you also may know, the economy sucks ass right now and people don’t consider facials a necessity. (They are, you know. Your skin is very important to take care of!) Anyway, while I was in school, we did “clinicals “ on actual people.

Some men, but mostly women. I started to become aware that women, no matter what their age, seem to be unaware of their chin hair. It’s shocking! Women coming in for a facial, eyebrow and lip wax – don’t want or aren’t interested in having their chins waxed! FFS!!! The majority of the women I worked on desperately needed their chins waxed. Some had five o’clock shadows! Ladies, we are in the 21st century. The ‘60’s are long past and crunchy-granola, let’s be all natural, days are gone. Seriously, look in the mirror and get rid of your chin hair. It’s unattractive. You’ve got styled eyebrows, a clean lip, landscaped pubes, bare pits and legs but you have a fuzzy chin! If your esthetician offers to wax your chin. for God’s sake – LET HER! Don’t go through all the expensive of a facial and waxing then come out looking like Maynard G. Krebbs! (Google! him.) I’ll stop ranting now. But this is something that really appalled me and it was something I never noticed before I went to school. I’m giving you words of wisdom here, pay attention!

Now, I’m not only giving you advice but I’m going to give you a chance for an actual BABELAND Gift Card! How about that! Just answer the questions below in a comment and at the end of March, I’ll do a random drawing of all the correct responses for a $20.00 Babeland Gift Card. You can find the answers at Babeland.

Yeah, I know – I’m making you work for it. But who doesn’t want to peruse the Babeland pages. Think of it as window shopping for what you can buy if you win the gift card!

The questions:

1. Balls with a Ph.D. would be _______________.

2. Jesse James was a _______________.

3. A water Wizard would have a _______ ________.

They’re easy. Go. Look. What are you waiting for!

20 blew out from under the bed:

Fire Byrd said...

If you were close enough I'd be round for a weekly facial... just love them.... And you'll be pleased to know I don't have any chin hair!!!

Akelamalu said...

You can be sure I inspect my chin and upper lip regularly - no beard and moustache for me!

nitebyrd said...

FireByrd and Akelamalu - I'm so pleased to hear this! Maybe it's just a Florida thing. I find myself closely inspecting women's chins in any public situation now. I can tell you that I'm always checking my chin now! LOL Byrd, I love giving facials. It's so relaxing for me as well as my client!

Riff Dog said...

Dare I admit I knew who Maynard G. Krebbs was?

I've dated a couple chin hair women. Well . . . one date each, if that tells you anything. Yes, chin hair is a definite no-no.

Ron said... already know from my post that I DETEST this time change too, so I'm right there with ya, Sis! It's horrible! I'm not particularly fond of this time of the year anyway. Too many CHEERY people running around, bouncing off the walls screaming..."IT'S SPRING...IT's SPRING!"


Ok, moving on....

...I agree about the chin hair thing too...wax em' baby! Or at least tweeze them. My hateful grandmother always had one sticking out, which is why I think she reminded me of the Wicked Witch of the West!

And you're right, facials are/should be a necessity.

Great post, Nitebyrd!

I feel so much better having vented too!

Frequent Traveler said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
skywind said...

Oh, a sentimental guy. LOL.
Health is the Greatest Happiness
The World at The Present

Trixie said...

You'vw had me rushing to the mirror checking out my chin then nitebyrd! Proud to report hair free!

Sorrow said...

First , The time change makes me insane too! so you are not alone. loathsome
thinking about moving to Arizona just to escape it!
but I like my hair, thank you very much.
my leg hair, pit hair, eyebrow hair, chin hair, and whatever other hairs that might be..
the thought of having them yanked ripped shaved or waxed off..
makes me light headed..
I guess i am a gorilla,
and I am O K with that..

Joanna Cake said...

I was thinking about excess facial hair only the other day. I can remember my friend's mother getting her upper lip hair bleached. It is the curse of reaching a certain age in that hair just seems to start sprouting from all sorts of unwelcome areas. Is it a hormonal thing? One wonders if it is the same for those on HRT as those who are not...?

Anonymous said...

Going to check out Babeland!

You know, I shed tears every time I see the Humane Society commercial. Poor little animals. :(

Chin hairs....I HATE THEM! Why the hell do they have to grow there? I only have a few that show up but the second I can grab it with tweezers, they get pulled out! (you know, sometimes they are too short to grab them).

Anonymous said...

I get AWFUL facial hair. I wax the lot, from my chin, down my neck, my upper lip, everything. I sometimes even take off the side burns!!!!

I DESPISE facial hair, I carry tweezers and a mirror in my purse EVERYWHERE I go. I avoid standing in direct sunlight when I know I may have a stray or when I know I am due to wax. I am RIGHT with you on this girl!

Which reminds me *eww I do NEED to wax* !!!!


Frequent Traveler said...

Nitebyrd : Yeayyyyy ! (grins from ear to ear). So glad that you enjoyed the cherry pie when you made it !!! Foolprofoof recipes rock !

CrystalChick said...

Maynard Krebs... OMG, such a funny reference! LOL
I have had a couple of facials and they were wonderful. Unfortunately, only for my birthday one year and on vacations the other two times. :(
Although I'm happy to report I have no weird facial hair happening right now. Although with some of the other bod changes, it's probably just a matter of time.

Have a great week!!

nitebyrd said...

Riff ~ Dear God, man! You're not that old! I was a mere child when Maynard and Dobie were hot stuff. You must be a history buff. Ooops! Now I'm thinking - Riff in the buff ....

Ron ~ I'm still in the grips of torment for that lost hour. I never thought about facial hair before school, now it's an obsession. I stare at chins and eyebrows. Oh, btw, I ripped out 1/4 of my niece's eyebrow with a drop of misapplied wax. I think I screamed your name when I saw the hair on the strip! LOL

Skywind ~ Huh?

Trixie ~ That's good to hear. :)

Sorrow ~ It's not a good thing. Just messes up my whole aura. Women that don't wax or shave, are beautiful because they are complete and happy with themselves. What bothers me are the women who want to be hairless and have their lips and eyebrows done but ignore their chins. It's not in balance with what they are trying to achieve. If I weren't involved in this business, I probably wouldn't think about it but I am and have become a chin hair activist!

Cake ~ Yes. I'm at that age and have wax and/or tweezers at the ready! LOL I don't know about women on HRT because I refused to do it. I'll have to look into that.

RHT ~ Definitely check out Babeland! I'm a sucker for animals in distress. Get some Tweezerman tweezers, they are awesome! They can get the tiniest hairs.

rosie ~ Good girl! I always get this one crazy eyebrow hair that grows overnight to extraordinary lengths, even after I've plucked it out and a chin hair that refuses to die. My wax and tweezers are always available.

Annie ~ That pie was so good! It's much easier than the one I used to make with the cornstarch. I did use the Oregon Tart cherries because the Bing weren't available and added a little more sugar. Thank you again.

Crystal Chick ~ Facials are not only good for your skin but are good for your spirit and soul. I'm glad you're watching for hair because it can spring out overnight! Maynard popped into my head for some reason, I have no idea why.

Spiky Zora Jones said...

Ha...that's Gilligan. cool sweetie.

Yeah, when I was in Memphis I saw a lady with practically a full mustache...odd as can be.

sweetie...some gals need big help.

ciao sweetie.

Indi said...

nitebyrd~ I am fair so if I do have the occasional hair sprouting... I can't see it. As goes pubic and arm pit hair!! I don't know why some women look like gorillas! I like a nice trimmed pube, less organic dental floss to be pcked out of your teeth!! YUK!!..

Anonymous said...

Totally unrelated to chin hair.... it must be "day 3" now for you hon?

Do you feel as bloody crappy as I do on these patches? Tired, headache, pale, dry rasping cough? But the tiredness... ugh...

Hope its going well, keep it up! I was SO pleased to get your comment over on my patch and know that someone else is going through the same as I am.


june cleaver said...

okay-just clicked on your today... I think you are my new best friend. You have me howling!

Oh-and I read a few of you other posts... and the one about the Rabbit-I have not been so lucky to get the eyes in the back of my head effect with mine.

So please... explain.


nitebyrd said...

Spiky ~ You probably know that there is a condition that will cause women to have excess facial hair, hence The Bearded Lady circus thing! LOL My peeve is the women that go through all the damn hair removal/skin care and leave their chins fuzzy. Seriously, WTF?

Indigo ~ If some women like the natural look, so be it. It’s not for me. I prefer no hair and like a postage stamp in the pube area. I also like my men to be clean – waxed or shaven. You are so correct about the hair in the teeth or worse, on the tonsils!

Rosie ~ I’m doing fairly well with the patch. No, I’m lieing – I’M GOING EVER SO SLOWLY CRAZIER THAN I ALREADY AM!!! I love smoking and this quitting is horrible. I will do it, though. I can no longer justify the cost. We pay enough damn taxes for everything so I refuse to give the government and/or the state anymore of my money. I’m always tired so I haven’t noticed a difference. I have had some damn odd dreams but nothing sexual. Shit!!! We’ll keep in touch to monitor each others progress, okay?
(((Hugs, right back atcha!)))

June Cleaver ~ Thank you! I’m really glad you stopped by. Your pictures of Chad definitely are drool-worthy. I LOVE me some Nickelback. I enjoyed your blog as well and will be back to do some more reading. As for the Rabbit, read some erotica while having some wine or beer. If you can do these things while in a warm bath, so much the better. After you come out of the bath rub some nice lotion all (ALL) over yourself. Now settle back in bed with some lube. Make sure you lube yourself thoroughly, that every nook and cranny has been lingeringly lubed. Now lube up the Rabbit. Start at the lowest setting with some lazy grinding around those twitching ears. Once you start getting that “feeling” crank that sucker up and let go. You’ll never want to leave the bedroom again! Keep all children and animals away from the room as these pose a threat to your concentration and you might scare the crap out of them with all the moans and eye rolling. If this doesn’t work, I recommend investing in a Hitachi Magic Wand. Your eyes will not only roll back in your head but you’ll start singing “Oh! Sweet Mystery of Life At Last I Found You …” like Madeline Kahn in “Young Frankenstein.”