Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Brain Dump



  • Seven (7) days without sugar, salt, pasta, carbs or Pepsi. I’m officially homicidal.*
  • Men with cell phones and cranky children should not be allowed in grocery stores. Ever.
  • If you’re told about the collection for the boss’s Christmas present two days before the party and the present has already been purchased you should not feel obligated to donate.
  • Lunge walking and skipping should not be part of any exercise routine. All uncoordinated people over the age of 10 should never, ever be asked to skip.
  • Depression + assholes + commercials that started before Halloween – money = No Christmas spirit.
  • I got eye shadow called, are you ready …. Unicorn Pee! (click on Unicorn Pee to go to Mrs. Evil's Etsy Shop)  Isn’t that fabulous?
  • The Walking Dead on AMC totally kicks ass. It’s one wickedly excellent TV show.
  • About 50 vultures were circling the schoolyard today. That can't be good.
  • My dog, the maltipoo, keeps getting these little hitch-hiker seed pods stuck all over him and he is an absolute bitch when I want to brush them out. No matter how often I brush the little bastard, the pods are still on him and all over my clothes. WTF?
  • Renewed my membership in the Nickelback Fan Club. (Shut up!)
  • Anyone know where I can get some good Prosperity candles? The ones I have aren’t working.
  • I want to be someplace else.
  • Mike & Molly on CBS makes me laugh out loud and even pee a little ‘cause I’m laughing so hard.
  • Two very good friends are now sharing each others lives. I introduced them. That’s a good thing.
  • Godsmack’s “Voodoo” is the sexiest song. Ever. Mmmm …. Sully.
  • Susan came in the office the other day. She’s doing good. Her left side is paralyzed but she is able to walk with a cane. Her left arm still isn’t working at all and she gets very tired, very easily. But she knows exactly what she’s talking about and has really good spirits.
  • I want a kitten.
  • My son is still living on his own. *knock wood*
  • I need to dye some fabric to make more Zombie Mommies. I’m going to make some zombie skull snowman earrings.

That’s enough for now, don’tcha think? I'll leave you with some entertainment just 'cause I like this song ~




Caress Me Down by Sublime

* I had two pieces of bread today. Humanity is safe. For now ....

26 blew out from under the bed:

Ron said...

"Seven (7) days without sugar, salt, pasta, carbs or Pepsi. I’m officially homicidal.*"

Yeah, I'm afraid I would be too! Can you at least have coffee?

"I got eye shadow called, are you ready …. Unicorn Pee! Isn’t that fabulous?"

Yes, faaaaabulous! You must tell me where you got it, because I may want to do a review on my other blog.

So glad to hear that Susan is doing well. She sounds like such an amazing lady!

Oh, and please let's not even talk about Christmas, because it's still three weeks away, and I'm already wanting to SMACK customers - HA!

X ya, Sis!

vixen kitten said...

So happy to hear Susan is doing well!

I like this brain dump. I may need to steal the idea. I don't have much energy for any other kind of blogging.

Hang in there, Sweetie. Carbs or no carbs, you are loved.

xoxo
~vk~

Jennie @ Modern Mamaz said...

Amen to #2 - Except I don't think men should be allowed in grocery stores EVER.

Kimber Leszczuk. said...

Where did you get the Unicorn Pee -my 9 year old is at the age where she thinks if she doesn't get to wear makeup she is going to die but she also LOVES unicorns SO if I give her a makeup that is called unicorn pee - she may get all grossed out and not want to wear it.... just a thought. I THINK IT IS AWESOME!

I also think The Walking Dead is awesome.

I am glad your friend is doing okay.

I think men with cell phones and grumpy children are great in the stores because it makes me shop a lot faster and not buy a lot of the stuff that is bad for me that I want to linger and get that I shouldn't - they make me get the hell out of there in half the time or less! LMAO

Anyways - I love your blog! Keep up the good work!

Vixen said...

Right....um....I'm still stuck on the no carb, sugar, salt, pasta part......

*hugs*

xoxo

Fat Controller said...

Just for the record...what colour is unicorn pee?

BlacknickSculpture said...

No pasta or sugar? Are you doing penance for something LOL ??

Kallan said...

Wow.. you have so much going on right now.. talk about Stress City! Hang in there, darlin.. Big hugs.. lots of love!
A tip on the prosperity candles.. how about carving some of your favorite prosperity symbols into the candles.. add your own energy.. and put some Bergamot or Patchouli oil on them too.
Sending good thoughts your way!

Dangerous Lilly said...

"Seven (7) days without sugar, salt, pasta, carbs or Pepsi. I’m officially homicidal.*"

I don't even know what to say to that. Except, well, I couldn't do it. No how, no way. I'm probably need to be drugged up 24-7 on klonopin.

Lunges? while walking? Skipping? who IS this sadist and why haven't you killed them??

Joker_SATX said...

That was one hell of a Brain Dump! I wish I could do that....

Red Shoes said...

Zombie Mommies??

I need to know more about these... do you sell them??

I have a couple of Christmas Lists that are just screaming for 'Zombie Mommies'...

~shoes~

Akelamalu said...

Good news about Susan!

Whenever I went on a diet I cut out bread and was suicidal like you. When I was diagnosed diabetic the dietician said I had to eat two slices of granary bread per day and insisted I would lose weight. She was right I have lost 14lbs!

Riff Dog said...

This is great stuff! I was nodding "Hell yeahs!" with most of it. Except the Nickelback fan club part. I won't tease you about that, though, because you redeemed yourself with the Sublime tune. ;-)

(*** Truth be told, I happen to like Nickelback a lot.)

Dianne said...

Unicorn Pee sounds wonderful!!
I would like to pair it with Rainbow Farts cheek blush

I know exactly where you're coming from re. Christmas spirit and wanting to be someplace else

wanna run away together?

Spiky Zora Jones said...

ha...hehehe. I'm gonna have a brain dump as soon as I find my brain. :)

I like your list...I have to make my christmas wish list to post. oh but it isn;t nice. hehehe.

later sweetie. ,

Mama Kelly aka Jia said...

Unicorn Pee??? I am checking out the etsy shop now as I may just have to get some for the teenager for under the Winter Tree

nitebyrd said...

Ron ~ Yes, I can have coffee but can't use dairy. I use Almond Milk, it tastes like ass. I asked Mrs. Evil for a sample of the eye shadow so I can send it to you. Susan is very determined and that's a good thing!

VK ~ Nice to see you, hun! I'm trying to cure some writer's block/blah, I thought the brain dump might help. ♥ you!

Jennie ~ Yes, that's true. All men should be banned. The old farts are as bad as the clueless dads.

Kimber ~ Thanks for stopping by! Tell her no unicorns actually had to pee to make the shadow it's really unicorn spit! ;)

Vixen ~ People tell me I'll get used to it and will not miss those things after a while. I think they're lying their asses off!

FC ~ It's a lovely light grayish-blue with silver sparklies.

Blacknick ~ It's the Paleo Diet or caveman diet. I'm not supposed to eat anything that wasn't around when the cavemen were. So I pretty much eat meat, sticks, twigs and berries! ;)

Kallan ~ I'll try adding the Bergamot and/or Patchouli. I do carve in the names of people I want to help but haven't done symbols. I'll give them a try, too. Thank you!

Lilly ~ The exercises are part of CrossFit. A brutal, paid for torture in the disguise of exercise. You don't even want to know about the Burpees. Scarier than Freddie Kruger and Jason together. Only 6 more weeks on the diet! WooHoo!

Joker ~ Oh! Hell! That's not even 1/4 of what I've got rollin' around in there. It's like the warehouse at the end of Indiana Jones and Raiders of The Lost Ark in my head. You can do it, just have a few beers and not eat anything good for at least a week!

Red Shoes ~ Yes, I make and sell dolls called Zombie Mommies. Unfortunately, there's only one in my Etsy shop right now, The Bride (www.nitebyrd.etsy.com) but you can check her out to get an idea.

Akelamalu ~ I've just found out I can make some type of "bread", I'll be checking that out. I also need to buy a scale. Good for you on your weight loss!

Riff ~
My brain is a weird and wonderful thing! Isn't it? I know you're a closet NB fan. Srsly, I'm not the only one buying all those CD's! I'm a fan of Sublime, mostly. Some of their stuff - not so much. Not sure what direction they are going to take with Rome but it should be interesting. They're playing here this weekend at a huge festival type concert that I can't go to because of my office Christmas party. *dammit*

nitebyrd said...

Dianne ~ LOL! I have a banana scented candle called "Monkey Farts", I bought it and the eye shadow 'cause I just LOVED the names! I'd adore running away with you ~ some place with some studly lotion rubbing pool guys!

Spiky ~ Hun, you have an incredible brain! I like the naughty lists better, anyway! ;)

Mama Kelly ~ If she doesn't have any, just "convo" her, she'll get it right up for you. I had to buy another because my daughter took mine! Just came over for a visit and snatched it right up!
She's lucky I like her.

distracted said...

I feel your pain on the sugar/pasta/bread thing. I've been doing it for months. It is totally paying off but it is torture!!

Mike and Molly makes me pee too! I'm loving it so far.

Caress Me Down is sexy as hell.

Plus, I am dying over the unicorn pee eyeshadow and rainbow farts blush.

nitebyrd said...

Distracted ~ So far the two pieces of bread and a cookie have satisifed the crazed carb monster inside me. I passed up pasta last night! I have to go by a scale as I don't have one but I think I see a difference. And, YAY! for you!
I'm going to tell Mrs. Evil to work on that Rainbow Fart blush! LOL

Joanna Cake said...

Just what colour is unicorn pee then?

Sandra said...

This was hilarious! On your first point about not having any sugar, pepsi, carbs...I think I was on that diet for about 7 months. My family barely came out alive.
This was great girl! As for your little dog, he shouldn't be out playing in the tumbleweeds and the sunshine of FLORIDA!!!!...yes, I'm jealous, I still wish I could move there!

Indi said...

nitebyrd ~ I think kids of any fuckin age should be banned from any freakin supermarket from the age of day one up to 17... mother's who let their brats run around should be shot at dawn! I am celebratin today actually ;) It is a whole 28 days today that I had my last fag... so I'm guessin with your strict exercise regime and strange food fads, giving up smokin isn't exactly high on your list to do's? I've been walkin to work this week, I've done 15 from Monday to today... I have muscles I dodn't know I had let alone where they were!! I now have solid thighs, I could crush a cocanut with them, good job they're out of season right now, it could be devastating!!


Indi

xx

ZomBee said...

aaah Nothing like a good brain dump to clear the cobwebs.
I enjoy these so much.
It's like a bag of bite-sized candy bars.

Anonymous said...

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